“I’m worried about accidentally saying something that the analysts will pounce on. As a result, I speak slowly and have lots of “uhs”. I know I sound tentative. But I don’t know what to do about it.”

Those are the the words of the CEO of a $1 billion-a-year publicly traded company. I was working with him last week in preparation for a major presentation to analysts. 

Speaking in meetings, he is charming and engaging.  He smiles and is highly animated.

But when he stands to speak about his company to Wall Street, his voice is flat and tentative. He sticks to a script all costs. As a result, he doesn’t sound confident. Of course, that’s not what you want when you’re the CEO of a $1 billion-a-year company.

I understand his dilemma. On the one hand, he doesn’t want to make a mistake and allow the analysts to pounce. On the other hand, he doesn’t want to sound dull and uncertain.

What’s a poor CEO to do? 

My advice was to loosen up and rehearse like crazy. 

He clearly needed to speak with more animation, something he could do with no problem. In fact, when we worked together, I told him to get more excited and put away his notes. He sounded highly engaging. It was an incredible transformation.

Of course, he didn’t deliver his presentation perfectly. He made a few mistakes. But his mistakes weren’t catastrophic.  And with more rehearsal, he will make even fewer mistakes.

Too many people over-rely on notes in an attempt to get the words perfect. The problem is that the search for perfection makes you come across as tentative.

Better to loosen up. Remember the goal of speaking isn’t perfection. It’s connection.

Popularity: 27% [?]

A UCLA Psychology Professor named Albert Mehrabian did a study in 1971 of the way we communicate. He found that 55 percent of the impression that we make is based on physical things like facial energy, posture, gestures, and eye contact. He found that 38 percent of the impression we make is based on how we sound.

 That leaves 7 percent for content.

This is one of the most famous studies in the public speaking business. It is often cited for the idea that content doesn’t matter.

That’s absurd.  Content matters a lot.

But don’t disregard Dr. Mehrabian’s study.  People judge us based on how we look and how we sound. Here are four steps to improving your communication style without the help of a coach.

Step 1. The next time you give a presentation, record it with a video camera.  If you’ve never done this, it can be shocking and revealing.  Working with an attorney recently, I showed her a brief clip of her presentation before I gave her any feedback.  “Oh dear,” she said, somewhat shocked. “I look like a slug.”  The camera showed vividly how bored she looked. I often tell my clients that the camera is a far better coach than I am.  Nothing beats seeing how you appear to others.

Step 2. Look first for eye contact. If your eye contact is down at the floor or directed solely at your notes, then you have a problem that must be corrected immediately. Failure to make eye contact makes connection with your listeners impossible.  You should be having random, miniature conversations with individual members of your audience.  To practice eye contact, set up chairs around the room and make eye contact with imaginary audience members. At our offices, we have Halloween masks mounted on sticks that we place in chairs to pose as listeners.

Step 3. Listen for vocal energy. This is where most people can make the biggest improvement. You have to sound excited about your ideas. One of the most common things that clients will say when I show them their videotapes is simply, “I don’t sound enthusiastic.” To improve passion, try speaking about something you’re passionate about, forcing yourself to get overly excited. You want to sound like you’re having an animated dinner conversation with a close friend.

Step 4. Look for facial energy. While watching the videotape of yourself, turn off the volume. Do you look excited? When I first saw myself on camera, I was appalled at my flat facial energy.  I forced myself to smile for a month. My “smiler” muscles ached.  To fix facial energy, exaggerate. Do more with your eyebrows and your eyes. It may feel weird, but it will look good. As Billy Crystal said, “It is better to look good than to feel good.”

As business people, we tend to think that the only thing that matters when we talk is content. But if you want to connect with others, pay attention to how you look and sound.

Popularity: 35% [?]

If you have a tough message to deliver, put on your best baby face.  That’s the message from a new study done by Columbia Business School.

It turns out that controversial messages are more believable if the spokesperson has a “baby-ish” looking face. People with baby faces — big eyes, high foreheads, small chins and small noses — tend to be perceived as trustworthy, according to the study conducted by Prof. Gita Johar of Columbia along with with Profs. Gerald Gorn and Yuwei Jiang of Hong Kong University of Science and Technology.

According to an article released recently by Columbia:

Subjects were shown fictitious news articles describing mild or severe side effects caused by a drug. The articles were accompanied by different pictures of CEOs, some baby-faced and some with more mature-looking faces. When side effects were described as less severe, subjects reported believing the baby-faced CEOs more often than the mature-faced CEOs. But there are limits to the baby-face effect: when side effects were described as being more severe, subjects were less likely to trust either the baby-faced or the mature-faced CEOs’ claims of ignorance.

Popularity: 25% [?]

If you doubt the connecting power of a smile, consider the conclusions of a study out of Great Britain.  When someone looks you in the eye and gives you a warm, genuine smile, the positive stimulation that you feel may be better than sex, chocolate, or shopping.

That’s the conclusion of a study out of Scotland.  And it’s just one more reason why people who want to be great communicators need to remember that smiling and facial energy are critical to connecting with listeners.

According to an article in The Scotsman, a Scottish newspaper, tests were carried out on adult volunteers to determine the effects of various factors in creating a short-term high. An electromagnetic brain scan machine and heart-rate monitor measured brain and heart activity to create a “mood-boosting value” for various stimuli. The tests were carried out on 109 volunteers and followed up by a poll of 1,000 adults.

In the clinical tests, the subjects were shown photos of friends, family and loved ones smiling, given money, and chocolate.

Participants who were shown a child’s smile experienced the same level of stimulation as they would have had from eating 2,000 chocolate bars or receiving £16,000 in cash.

The subsequent survey found that seeing a smile was more likely to create a short-term high than sex, chocolate and shopping.

Now if someone can just find a way to combine all three.

Popularity: 26% [?]

Today is the birthday of a man who won the White House, in part, on the power of a radiant smile.  As much as anyone who ever lived, former President Jimmy Carter stands as an example of the power of personal connection.

Carter was famous for his inability to connect well on television.  Ronald Reagan did the TV thing far better. But Carter won the presidency in large measure because when you met him you couldn’t help but like the guy.

I’ve met Jimmy Carter twice and both times he blew me away with his personal charisma.

When I was a cub reporter with The Times in Gainesville Ga. I was assigned to cover a health conference at Emory University that was being led by Carter in 1984. At the conference, I had the chance to interview the former President in a small interview room.

The interview went fine. But what was most interesting to me was what happened after the interview was over. Carter started asking me questions!  He wanted to know where I had been to college and where I was from.  

And as I spoke, he smiled at me and looked me in the eye. He seemed truly interested in everything I had to say. For the short time I was with him, his eyes and that smile made me feel like everything I said was incredibly important to him.  He seemed totally focused on me.

I’ve met many people who have had similar encounters with Carter. Many have reported similar experiences.

The second time I met Carter was about two years ago on an airplane. I was returning to Atlanta from New York. As I boarded the plane, there was Jimmy seated in first class beside his wife Rosalynn.

When everyone finished boarding, Carter stood and made his way to the back of the plane, stopping to greet everyone on the flight. 

“Hi,” he said, extending his hand to everyone as he worked from row to row. “How are you. It’s nice to be traveling with you.” And as he said it, he looked you right in the eye and smiled. You couldn’t help but smile back.  The atmosphere in the plane was buzzing with excitement. 

The man has incredible personal charisma. And it’s largely because of his smile.

Popularity: 20% [?]

“Hair is the first thing. And teeth is the second. Hair and teeth. A man got those two things, he’s got it all.”

Those are the words of the Godfather of Soul, James Brown.  

I don’t suppose he was speaking about public speaking. But he was talking about the importance of impression.  

One of the easiest ways to make a good impression is simply to smile.  

Too many people, when making speeches or presentations fail to do anything with their face other than look overly serious.

If you want to make a great impression, make like James Brown. Remember that people want to see some teeth.

Smile!  It’s like a handshake with the face.

Popularity: 17% [?]

Sure Billy Mays has terrible gestures. And sure they’re distracting. But Billy Mays isn’t a highly successful pitchman for no reason. He’s successful because he knows how to get listeners fired up about his products. 

What fires people up is his vocal and facial energy.

If he really wanted to, Billy Mays could fix his gestures.  But what if he calms down his gestures and at the same time loses the amazing energy?

That’s not a good trade off.

Gestures don’t sell. Energy does. Passion is contagious and gets people fired up to buy.  

So fix the gestures if you can Billy Mays. But don’t lose that energy. Because that energy is what’s putting the spaghetti on your table. 

Popularity: 20% [?]

If you think you have trouble connecting and building relationships, you might learn why from the Chinese Police.  Apparently the Chinese Police and Military officers need to work on improving their facial energy so as not to scare the tourists in Beijing for the Olympics.

They’re scaring the tourists with their stony faces, according to a member of the Norwegian Olympic Committee.

“The police and military … need to act differently,” said Gerard Heiberg. “They have stony faces. They’re seriously scaring the foreigners in Beijing. Something has to be done.” he said.

Heiberg said that he had met with Chinese Olympic organizers about the issue. “I’ve asked them to smile more,” he said. 

Heiberg said that his request wasn’t taken seriously.

Perhaps he would have been more persuasive if he had explained to the Chinese authorities that the coaches at Speechworks say, “A smile is like a handshake with your face.”

Popularity: 18% [?]

Watching John Edwards interviewed about his confessed affair, you have to admire the man’s ability to communicate.  Everything about him conveys a sense of believability.  

He makes unwavering eye contact. He speaks with total committment and energy in his voice. He varies his facial and vocal energy. When asked questions, he gives straight, simple answers. There appears to be no attempt to evade.

And when he says he has no love child, I want to believe him. 

But he has the problem that many extremely polished communicators have. He’s almost too polished. 

Do you believe him?

Popularity: 21% [?]

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebu0OBa1pus

What do I love about this clip? I love Ali’s facial intensity. Notice the animation.   He’s not just reciting some speech.  He’s trying to get you to understand it with his face. You can’t avoid paying attention to him because of the intensity that comes through in his eyes, and eyebrows, and smile. 

That’s what the best speakers do. They show how they feel with their face. It’s a lesson we could all learn from Ali.

Popularity: 20% [?]